And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
