Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
