I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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