Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize