You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Panties = found
Randomize
