Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
