Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize
