This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
