he wants to bone in the snuggie
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
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