Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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