things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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