This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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