Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
