spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
