dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize