At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
birth control should be required to get into college
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
