Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
