is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
