is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
