Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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