I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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