a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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