I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
Randomize
