I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
