Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
