I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I am naked and annoyed.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
