'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
