I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
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