i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize