She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
now i know why i became what i already was.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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