Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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