I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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