I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize