NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
You're earring is so big in my mouth
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
