apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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