Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
