Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
