....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize