I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
