so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
