Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
