omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
