My brain says no but my pants say off.
There's always time for handjobs
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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