My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
