physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
