i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
