scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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