He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
