he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
