I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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