He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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